What fucking good is it to “stay strong” when all you ever fucking do is “Stay Strong”?? When it seems like all you’ve done every single day of your life is just “Stayed Strong”. And for what?? We struggle and fight each and every single day of our lives to stay alive, use all the strength we have to stay alive, only to be faced with the inevitable. Only to fucking die in the end. Oh life. Why do you gotta be so fucked up??
Haha……..that old school gentleman look went out of style really fast, at least on Tumblr. haha. I feel bad for the dudes that got tattoo’s and shit like that just to get the “Likes” on Tumblr during the height of that style.
The Scariest Part About Mental Illness.
To me, in my personal opinion, and mine only, the scariest part of mental illness, is not the medication, not the label, not the rate of suicide, not the anxiety attacks for no apparent reason, not the 50+ sets of hand washing every single day till your hands bleed, not the fear of going out, not the rapid heart rate and swollen throat and the feeling of your blood turning into pins and needles pressing against your face as it goes flush when you find out someone is sick, not the loss of appetite from depression, not the feeling of failure, or of being a failure, not the dread of waking up each day to the same shit, not the feeling of shit crawling under your skin as you desperately try to fight OCD on your own by not doing a ritual or fixing something, but failing miserably as you give into it and that feeling goes away, the same feeling of a sneeze and the same relief of a sneeze when you finally do sneeze, not the feeling of people are always out to get you or have some secret plan to fuck you over, not the feeling of shame when you go to your first therapy session and people automatically know you have issues.
Nope. None of that. Not to me. The scariest part to me, is knowing that its all inside of your head. And im not talking about that ignorant bullshit people spew when they have no idea what the fuck you go through, and just say “Oh get over it, its all in your head”. What im talking about is actually knowing and realizing that it is all in your head, that there is something not clicking in our brains, something is not functioning properly, not like a “normal” brain. And knowing that something you cant feel, you cant hold, you cant see, taste or smell, is completely destroying your life and taking over everything you thought you once were. Understanding that “Something” is so powerful that you have become a slave to it. In a sense, you literally have become your own worst enemy. Fully knowing, in your “rational mind”, that nothing bad is going to happen if you only tap 3 times instead of 4, or you know that 7 years of bad luck is not going to happen if you dont share a picture, because you know that life does not FUCKING work like that, but its so powerful that, on your own, you do not have the power to tap 3 times instead of 4 or not share that message, that its so powerful that you give into it each and every single fucking time. Knowing that you really have no logical reason to be afraid of something (Not always, I know. Im talking general), but each time a “trigger” happens, you’re ready to faint, or cry and hide. You know that 9.99/10 times, nothing bad happens in big groups, but every single time you find yourself in one, you’re a goner. Again, knowing something is that small, that unknown, one single microscopic chemical imbalance is causing your whole fucking life as you knew it to take a drastic turn for the worst, and just staying that way. Thinking, “It came out of nowhere, just happened. So surely it has to just go away as it came along” until you realize that you’ve been saying the same thing for the last 7 years of your life. Looking at yourself in the mirror, trying to give yourself half assed, pathetic, shitty pep talks saying, “Cmon man, its all in your head, you know that. You fucking know that. Dont wash your hands man. You wont die, and most likely nothing bad is going to come from that. Dont be a pussy. Fuckin grow up. Arent you tired of this?? You know people dont wash their hands all the time, and they’re rarely sick. Be a fucking man for once!!”. And right then and there, the “Irrational” mind pipes in saying, “FUCK THAT MAN!! If you dont tap one more time to make it an even number, bro your moms gonna get into a car crash, you’re going puke, heck, you might slip and fall outside if you dont. Oh, and wash your hands. Dont listen to this guy telling you not to. He’s a fucking liar. He doesnt know anything. Listen to me man. Wash your hands now, with 2 pumps of soap, and you’ll be fine. Nothing bad will happen. You’ll be safe. But if you dont, like I said, you’re going to be fucked”. To me, thats the scariest part. Knowing the truth, knowing the rationality of it, knowing how life works, but always giving in to that “Irrational” mind, time after time again. Knowing that it is all in your head, but its controlling your life, and for the most part, it just took up residence in your mind. Hopefully, when you look at things like that how I just looked at it, you gain a better appreciation and get a huge “Wow” factor, showing how fucking powerful our minds and brains really are, but also, how amazing we really are as people. Scientists still havent been able to understand the brain, 100%. We can build robots and send people to space, but we still cant understand something we are born with, something that resides inside of our heads, and never shuts off, and that thing inside our head is what allowed us to build things and send people out to space, but we dont know how it did that. To me, thats the scariest thing about mental illness. Its one of the most powerful things in the world, and we cant even see what it it looks like, only what we look like when we have it.
Now we’ve got children thinking that they’re born to fist fight.
Cause they’ve been promised an apocalypse by prophets without insight.
They could have fooled us, in fact we’re dumbstruck.
The school bus is looking like a dump truck.
Stuffed to the glass like a landfill until it overflows.
Babysitters cant get the students off their mobile phones.
A junkyard dog is eating trash at the cafeteria,
He’s getting mad at America.
when u call out “mohamed” at the mosque
Ohhhhhh myyyyyy goshhhh. I laughed wayyy too hard at this and I feel like an asshole, but its tooo funny!! Ohh man hahahaha.
Stretched Ear Care Question!!
Alright, my ears are at 1-1/4inch (32mm), im not stretching them any bigger, but im planning on getting some Vitamin E oil or Jojoba Oil to keep them healthy, cause I take my plugs out at night, and my one lobe always closes up a tiny, tiny bit, but enough to make it a hassle to get the plugs back in the next day and I have to kind of stretch it to get er in, and after a long ass time of that everyday, its starting to get “Raw” feeling, kind of tender and its gotten fucked up a few times and closed up smaller than an inch. I’ve always had alot of problems with the one lobe, while the other one has been a blessing. Never closes at all and its thick. So I want to get some kind of oil to apply to it to keep it healthy and from getting “Raw”/tender and/or infected, etc…I’ve never used Vit E oil or Jojoba before, so I dont know what would work best for care, not stretching. Any experiences?? Or are they both virtually the same?? Does the same thing happen to you?? What would you recommend?? Any help would be greatly appreciated, especially from someone with bigger sized ears, but all is welcome!! :) Just shoot it to me in my Inbox/Ask box area, as I dont know how to respond to people when they just reply on a post. Thanks!! :) <3